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Tuesday, December 5, 2006

Dear Santa, I Need Condoms for Christmas

So, I'm making it my New Year's resolution to have sex with my husband at least once a day for the upcoming year. I've really been slacking in this department, not because I want to, but having a child takes work and I'm just a little more tired than I was say, three years ago.

So this morning I was calculating out the number of condoms that I need to purchase in order to fulfill my goal and how much money it would cost. It went something like this...

365 days - (7 days for female "issues" x 12 months) - the 16 days he's fishing in October = 265 days

265 days / 12 condoms = 23 boxes

23 boxes x $30.00 per box (I'm allergic to latex, so we get the horribly expensive Naturalamb) = $690.00

*gasp, choke, gasp*

HOLY CRAP!!!

It's too expensive to have sex! I need a loan, or at best I need Santa to bring me condoms!!

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